And underneath my non-beard, is a pelage of coarse hair that bears and even hairy crabs envy.
But here is my problem. As brought up by Conor, its too late in our lives to dye our hair and whatnot. We're past the time when we can do these things with teenageawkwardawesome disregard for our appearance. Although I defiantly did try out some of those things (ie. Jncos)
Thusly, thoughtwroughtly and perpendicularly, I cannot look cool and be a metal singer. I just can't. No matter how much I practice (in my car, alone, on empty roads) I will never look cool/be able to perform without genuine and just mockery of me, a doofus, able to act Nordic, sound Nordic, but not look Nordic. Copernicus, whose last name was ___, was born
in Warsaw, and he used one of the first ___
telescopes, which was invented by ___.
This primitive telescope was little more than two pieces of
___ stuck on each end of a/an ___.
In 1600 an Italian ___ named Galileo
expanded Copernicus's ___ theories, but during the
Inquisition in Italy he was ___ arrested. After
___ for six months in jail, Galileo was
forced to ___.
My version goes as follows:
Thor's Uprising
Four hundred years ago people knew little about our
FUCKING universe. They thought that the earth was the
center of the entire UNIVERSE and that the sun and all of the
PITIFUL HUMANS revolved around it. But then a GOD
named THOR discovered the truth.
The FROZEN earth revolves around the RAGNARÖK.
THOR, whose last name was MIGHTY, was born
in FIRE, and he used one of the first
LEGENDARY HAMMERS, which was invented by ODIN.
This LEGENDARY HAMMER was little more than two pieces of
MOLTEN ROCK stuck on each end of a REDWOOD
In 600 BC a DEMON named SATAN
SPREAD THOR'S theories, but during the
Inquisition in HELL he was MADE KING. After
six months in HELL, SATAN was
forced to KILL EVERYONE.
And there you go! No real need of Norse Mythology knowledge. Just know some names and channel the darkess within, or something. Also, remember that this isn't a poem, its a TRAGIC DEATH BALLAD.
Well, Thats really about it. I want to do metal because its in my nature. I'll just have to keep practicing in my car when my metal music comes on. BTW, its kinda fun to do that with Bob Dylan as well.
YOU ALL NOW CAN BE A PART OF THE "HISTORIC ORANGE!" CLUB. NO MONEY NEEDED TO BECOME A MEMBER. WE LOVE FREE TURKEY DINNERS. HAM IS OK BUT ONLY A SUBSTITUTE ONCE. GET YOUR FREE OFFICIAL SEAL OF APPROVAL OF MEMBERSHIP TO THIS PRESTIGIOUS CLUB-OF-SORTS.


Its not at all intuitive as the suggested strategy is to hide in a hole until the colossus goes digging for you. Here is the problem: You have to actually lure the thing (like a fish) slowly and surely into place (the correct place that is) and if you decide to creep around the tunnels below and out of one of the other holes, the thing sees you even though you're hidden behind the entrance.
Björk also had a part in this whole thing as she and her performance-artist butt seems to just want to make the world even stranger. As well as making Pandas sexy. (see right)
I was not going to take this drug under any circumstances. Thankfully no one was holding down my wrists and ankles or forcing the medication in me anymore. Although I wasn't sure if I could be sure of what had been injected into me before.
For example "I was researching the fundamentals of internet memes so that I could stay abreast in today's technological society." Our redux is very simple: "I was researching the fundamentals of internet memes so that I could stay aboobie in today's technological society."
Ok, now that I'm on the hunt for jobs and such and seeing as I have established a certain domain in which I should get a job, I have established an office. This is my office.